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17 May 2010 @ 12:39 pm
Pursuit of Nothingness  
Title: Pursuit of Nothingness
Rating: T
Words: 100
Pairing: House/misery (A.K.A "none")
Disc: I own nothing. There! I said it. Are you happy?
ATTENTION: if you're having trouble reading, you might want to CTRL+. Mac users hit command+ to enlarge font.
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Some nights, he’ll sit alone in the dark with a glass of whiskey and a fistful of pills, trying to imagine a place where there is no more pain, just a black, empty silence he can call home.

Other nights, he lets himself lay tangled in the sweat soaked sheets for hours on end, writhing and bucking in pain, because he needs to know if he’s still alive enough to die.

He doesn’t often remember his dreams, but the ones he can recall, he’s drowning. Sometimes, he’s falling.

The part that troubles him is he never wakes with a start.

 
 
 
 
Rainbow Tits Mcgeemisdreya on May 19th, 2010 07:09 pm (UTC)
Misery loves company, and this is a veritable orgy.

The last line was very powerful, especially since I've experienced the same thing before; not being especially disturbed at the thought of dying.
rivercrossing2rivercrossing2 on May 23rd, 2010 03:14 am (UTC)
Wow...very vivid look into the world of House's pain. Makes me want to wrap my arms around him and never let go! (((House))) (((You)))

On a contemplative note: I think House settles for misery because anything else (especially happiness) scares the crap out of him...the closest he came to admitting that was in the session with Nolan in "Broken", when Nolan was about to give him his first dose of meds.